Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Another Hard Day!

Today I was at another downtown school where I taught seventh and eighth graders. These were tough kids that were very disrespectful from the beginning. I found myself developing a horrible headache in the morning that progressed into a pretty major migraine.
Sometimes I just don't understand what the school systems are thinking. I was given 8th grade boys recess and lunch duty. I was the only girl in the entire gym full of boys playing football, basketball, etc. If a fight were to break out, everyone knew that I wasn't going to be able to stop it. Why was I given that job?
The worst part of the day was my 8th period class. These students were so rude to each other and to me. I don't think I had their attention during any of the class period. They were suppose to be doing busy work, which meant that, instead, they were up running around, yelling, talking across the room, writing notes, making paper airplanes, etc. Anything but working. It was so frustrating and nothing I seemed to say or do mattered. I would send a kid to another room or to the office and it didn't even phase the others. In fact, I had students ask me to send them to the office. They didn't care a bit!
At the end of the day, while I was collecting papers by the door as kids headed home, my cell phone was stolen. It had been on the teacher's desk to help me tell the time. The classroom clock didn't match the bell system, so I was using my phone to help me out. I had only left it for a second, and someone snatched it up. I was so disappointed! Once again, the Columbus students had let me down and I had lost control.
Another one of the teachers called my phone and a student actually answered but didn't say anything, so the teacher wasn't able to recognize his/her voice. When I went to go make a report in the office, the secretary told me that they didn't have anything for me because I was just a substitute! She said that the only thing I could do was to make a police report at the police station.
So needless to say, I don't have my phone anymore and had to have it turned off. I am going to try to get a new phone tomorrow, with a new number. Reed and I have been waiting to get Ohio numbers and get on a family plan, so we'll go ahead and do that tomorrow. You may receive a text or call from us soon with our new numbers. It's just a bummer that I don't have my list of numbers anymore or old pictures. Oh, well. I guess I am lucky that it wasn't my purse that was taken. I've been through that before, and really don't care to ever have it happen again.
There are two very frustrating things that have come out of today. The first thing is that, I try so hard to be careful about where I leave things because I have dealt with identity theft before, and then it happens AGAIN, to me.
Secondly, I have been waking up everyday trying to prepare myself for a good day of teaching and praying for the students and the whole day and get excited about another opportunity to teach, yet I come home defeated and beat up.
I have always felt like teaching is one of my spiritual gifts and LOVE doing it. So why is this SO hard and Why do I feel like such a failure?
Luckily I have the next couple of days to rejuvenate and seek God's counsel about teaching. I haven't given up just yet, but feel pretty sad about most of my experiences so far with the downtown schools.
The other lucky thing for me is my supportive hubby! Reed is SO great about taking care of me through my frustrations and stress! God definitely knew what He was doing when He was putting us together, I don't know how I made it through my tough days before him. All I know now is that I am so thankful to have him in my life and love him SO much!

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